Death Of Queen Elizabeth II - Coping With Change

Hi everyone.

It’s a strange time here in the UK right now. As they used to say in times gone by, “The Queen is dead. Long live the King!” Thankfully we are a bit more sensitive in the new century but nevertheless, everything seems totally out of kilter and off balance. As someone remarked the other day, “There’s a lot of stuff swirling around at the moment” since Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II finally came to the end of her long and incredible life and was succeeded with immediate effect (to use a very new century phrase) by her eldest son who is now King Charles III.

This “stuff that is swirling around” is probably an apt way of describing the wide range of feelings and emotions that many of us seem to be experiencing, not just in this country but across the world too. Much like when Princess Diana died so tragically in 1997, a huge number of people (myself included) seem to have been taken by surprise as to how much the death of a 96 year old woman, whom most of us had never met, has affected us.

Of course, death always seems to come as a bit of a shock to those left behind, even when it is “expected”. Not only does it bring us that little bit closer to our own mortality, it also can’t help but remind us of our own losses. It instantly seems to bring back memories of those we have loved and lost, whether those losses were forty days or forty years ago.

And this particular death, of a much loved and respected monarch who has been the figurehead of our country for the majority of us throughout our entire lives, certainly seems to have done that. In addition, the strong sense of “living through history”, as well as the desire to pay respect and acknowledge such a tremendous life of dedication and service, has prompted many acts from many people of all ages, backgrounds and walks of life. This includes the thousands and thousands of people who, even now, are still waiting patiently for up to twenty hours to spend 60 seconds gazing respectfully at a coffin.

But perhaps it is the sense of tremendous change that is affecting us the most. It was already an unsettling time before the Queen passed away, what with serious concerns about climate change, the economy, Brexit and the fallout from the pandemic. Now we have a new Prime Minister and a new monarch both taking office in the same week. No wonder the UK feels like it has been rocked on its heels. And as we all know, change can often feel scary and something to be anxious about. I recently put the house that I’ve lived in on and off for over 60 years up for sale because things around me in terms of neighbours etc seem to be changing and I feel anxious about what might happen in the future.

I have to keep reminding myself though that hard as it sometimes is to embrace it, change is both inevitable and often a force for good. The Queen’s own lifetime reflects the most tremendous changes for good including the huge advances in science, medicine, technology, healthcare and equal rights, to name but a few. And on the day that I woke up and thought it might be time to put the central heating on as summer looks as if it’s now changing into autumn and then winter, there is often nothing to be done except accept the things we can’t change and do what we can to change the rest.

Rest In Peace

Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

1926-2022

We shall never see your like again.

And if you are struggling with your emotions and feelings at the moment (as I think many of us are), especially if you don't have much of a community around you to share in the collective grief, I found this blog post from Nottingham Trent University both useful and interesting. 

https://www.ntu.ac.uk/about-us/news/news-articles/2022/09/expert-blog-what-can-queen-elizabeths-death-and-life-tell-us-about-the-value-of-group-memberships

And please don't forget that if you are in the UK and it all feels a bit too much at times, for whatever reason, you can always call the Samaritans 24/7 on 116 123.